13 reasons Santa Claus is definitely a conservative

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I’ve been making a list and checking it twice, and although I can’t tell you who’s been naughty or nice, I can say that Santa Claus has all the hallmarks of being a conservative.

Could it be true? Could everyone’s favorite Christmas figure be a right-winger? Well, let’s see the evidence:

1. Did you ever hear Santa wishing someone a “Happy Holidays?” No, for the man in red, it’s always “Merry Christmas” – no matter who it offends.

2. He lives in the North Pole – a tax haven with a zero percent tax rate – hardly a sign of someone who believes in government and wants to pay his “fair share.”

3. Santa’s whole mission is one of private charity. There are no records of the Santa Claus movement being given even $1 in public assistance. Santa epitomizes charity over welfare.

4. He is the sole employer in the area of huge amounts of unskilled elves. Does anyone really believe they are getting minimum wage? They certainly aren’t getting $15 an hour as the unions demand.

5. Speaking of unions, if one calculates the amount of work required at Christmas, there must be some solid all-nighters being pulled by the Santa team. There’s certainly no room for union-allocated breaks and hour limits. Santa’s factory would not meet the approval of the left.

Continue reading over at Fox news: http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2013/12/16/13-reasons-santa-claus-is-definitely-conservative/

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