Cuckolds, Cuckservatives, and Democucks


Warning: Any imagery in this column is purely intentional. If you’re offended easily…well, you’ll get over it.


Cuckservative– a word that I’ve seen bandied about on social media quite a bit for the last year or so.  It cropped up as a hashtag on Twitter, and has been used as an insult to conservatives by both the left and the right.  Since English is kind of my thing, I did some digging into the origin of the word.

As most people know, it’s a mashup of cuckold and conservative.  It’s come to mean a conservative who has sold out his principles, presumably from some form of self-loathing where he actually enjoys having his side get the pants beaten off of them..

I’m not going to get into the racial connotation that has been added to the word by folks that probably spend way too much time on Pornhub or way too much time saluting a swastika.  Milo Yiannopoulos does a good job of discussing that HERE

The term cuckold though has its roots with Shakespeare.  If you want some good Shakespearian insults, you can find all of his uses of the word HERE.  It was used most famously in Othello as Iago tries to convince the Moor that Desdemona is getting a little action on the side.

The word’s original definition was a man who had been cheated on, intimating that the queen of his house had a pretty firm stranglehold on the family jewels.

Knowing that, the word takes on a much different meaning to me.  I have been cheated on, and it’s been happening regularly for several years.  I’ve been cheated on by all the Republicans whom I helped get into office to do certain things, only to have them turn around and get in bed with the very people I put them there to oppose.  I feel comfortable using the pronoun we, because I’m absolutely not alone on this.

We were cheated on by John Boehner who swore that if we the people gave them a Republican majority in the House, they would get rid of Obamacare.  Sure, they took a bunch of show votes, but they were pretty much helpless.  They didn’t even have the guts to defund it since they were afraid of getting blamed for any move they would make, so we had to watch as they got bent over by the Senate Democrats.  We were cheated on as the Republican House passed spending increase after spending increase, giving Obama pretty much everything he wanted without even putting up a fight.

We were cheated on by Thad Cochrane who stooped to calling Democrats to come save him in his primary, using every epithet the left uses against conservatives.  His opponent was racist, sexist, and every other kind of –ist he could come up with. He told them that his opponent would take their welfare away from them.  All this as most of us were finally fighting back on social media against those very allegations from liberals.

So we gave them a Republican Senate, only to be cheated on again by Mitch McConnell and a host of other Senate Republicans who did nothing that they had promised to us.  Although repealing Obamacare was possible, they now whined to us that there was no point because Obama would never sign it.  They got on their knees as Obama rammed through a disastrous Iran nuclear deal.  They rolled over and gave him unparalleled trade authority.

But as true cuckolds, we waited, telling ourselves that they would come back to us eventually, because we were the ones for whom they really cared.

Sure, we sent them some signs that we were pretty angry at them.  Eric Cantor got thrown on his keister (presumably not bright enough to call Democrats to save him.) Boehner got ridden so hard he resigned as Speaker of the House.  That will show them we mean business, we told ourselves.  Then Paul Ryan took over and within a matter of months did everything Boehner had done that made us feel cheated on in the first place.  Forget defunding Planned Parenthood or getting some spending cuts.  The omnibus bill sailed through.

They kept telling themselves that we were only upset at them because they weren’t getting anything done, while we were shouting at them that it was that all the wrong things were getting done.  They were doing nothing to stop the actions that we saw as damaging to the home, our country.

Meanwhile our approval for their actions kept dropping.  In an AP-NORC poll of all Americans, a full 91% felt that the Republicans were moderately to not at all responsive to the will of the people.  Only 8% felt that they were doing a good job.

Here’s what they don’t tell you though.  While Democrats love to tout the fact that they have a higher approval rating than Republicans, what they don’t say is that it’s not much higher.  They get a whopping 14% of people who feel they are doing a good job.  86% of Americans don’t think the Dems are any better than the cheating Republicans

That’s right, most liberals think that they’re being cheated on too.  In fact, I’m giving them a name all to themselves—Democucks.

Democucks feel like they’ve been getting shafted by their politicians too, but for completely different reasons.  They aren’t responsive enough to Black Lives Matter, or they don’t approve their University safe spaces in speeches on the Senate floor.  Maybe they just haven’t given out enough free stuff.

78% of Americans think that the country is swirling like the Tid-E-Bol man right now. That number includes  cucks of both kinds.

So is it any wonder that this election year is different than most?  We’ve seen the rise of Donald Trump and Bernie Sanders.  While the media has concentrated on the split in the Republican Party, there’s a Grand Canyon sized fissure in the Democrat Party, too.  With the outing of the superdelegates in the Democrat primary process, Sanders supporters feel like they are getting their skirts lifted by the DNC.  And even Hillary supporters are having a hard time finding any enthusiasm.

The Nevada Democratic convention had to be shut down because of the threat of violence FROM OTHER DEMOCRATS!  Barbara Boxer was booed off the stage after mentioning Clinton’s name.  She said that she actually felt like she was in danger there.  Those weren’t Trump supporters threatening to riot.

Simply put, Trump and Sanders are flamethrowers, and there are a lot of Americans who are ready and willing to burn Washington DC to the ground and start all over.

To Republicans who have had it, Trump represents an outsider who will shake up the politics-as-usual establishment who are more concerned with keeping their office than actually doing something to help the country.  Trump threatens their existence, and many conservatives are more than fine by that.

To Democrats, Sanders represents new ideas.  Ironic, since he’s 74 and has held political office for 36 years, if you count his stint as mayor of Burlington, Vermont.  Hillary represents their establishment too well, and the Democucks feel the embarrassment every time they have to grab their ankles and defend her from everything from her private e-mail server to her feckless record to her husband’s sex scandals.  You can see it their faces.

While some will disagree with this, I don’t feel cheated on by conservatives who will not vote for Trump.  I can respect their decision.  I do feel cuckolded by those conservatives who will touch the screen for Hillary in November.  Trump may not be a rock solid conservative, but if I can agree with him 10% of the time, that’s more than I can say for Hillary.  And if he can get that 10% accomplished that will be more than we’ve had in years.

There comes a point where the cuckold, the cuckservative, and the Democuck has to finally stand up and say, enough.  We’re kicking you out of the house.  Good luck finding someone else who is willing to put up with you.